FINE

I hate the word "Fine". It's the 'other' 4-letter "F" word. It's a very bad word. It's a lie. And it's an easy lie.

"How are you?"
"Fine."
"How's everything going?"
"Fine."
"How's work, the kids, your husband?"
"Fine. Thanks. How are yours?"
"Oh, they're fine. Thanks."

It's bullsh*t.

I use 'fine' because I know that the people asking me how I am doing really don't care. They are asking to be polite.

There are very few people who ask me and REALLY want to know how I'm doing. These people get an honest answer. And when I give it, I know it will be prayed about, listened to, and that they truly care.

People who get 'fine' are the people I don't trust. Too many times I've said, "not so good", and had the person say, "Oh that's good. Me too". Or they ask and before I can say something, they're onto the next person or looking over my shoulder at everyone else.

Really. If you don't care, don't ask. I can tell if you care. If you get a "fine" then you haven't come off as sincere, and I don't trust you.

Sadly, when someone tells me they're fine, I take from that that they are NOT fine, and that they don't trust me. This makes me sad. You might be surprised how ready and willing I am to listen.

That is all. For tonight.
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

ROADTRIP

I went on a roadtrip with my good friend MO today. She's so fun and fabulous. I hope to have some pics up soon to chronicle our journey. We went from my house in the middle of Iowa to Lincoln, Nebraska. Took about 4 hours to get there (not including a stop in Walnut, IA to look at antiques), and the same to get back.
I had so much fun, listening to music with her, talking, laughing...

I hope we can do it again very soon!

Look for the pics...

Kissing...

I LOVE KISSING. I love to imagine kissing. I love to actually kiss. I don't think there could ever be enough kissing.
There are songs that make me melt if I just hear them. They make me want to kiss.
I'm thinking about kissing right now...and so are you ;-)

HAND

I have my mother's hands. I have always thought her fingers looked like elephant legs. Now, as it turns out, so do mine. Damn.
On a side note, I hate pink. Especially pink nail polish. But it looks good on me. I hate that, too.
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

If you could be invited to one person's birthday party, whose would it be?

Mine. I've never really had one. Birthdays are a sore spot with me. My mom brought a cake to a youth group event once...the event was sometime in July. I don't really want a birthday party...but I wouldn't leave. I hate, HATE being the center of attention. I always try hard to make sure that Barry and our kids have great birthdays...

Ask me anything

What was your favorite book as a child?

Chronicles of Narnia. Specifically, The Magicians Nephew. The description of Narnia's creation in that book is beyond compare.

Ask me anything

What's the oldest piece of clothing you still own and wear?

A blue, long-sleeved, GAP shirt. My dad took me shopping for it a few days before he passed away. It has holes in it. The sleeves are tattered, and the bottom and neck are frayed, but I still wear it occasionally when I'm missing him so much! It was the end of October 1993...I will say, the shirt has stayed together pretty well..considering.

Ask me anything

What TV show makes you laugh the loudest?

I really laugh when I watch Wipeout. That show makes laugh hysterically every week. Also, The Office. Usually the subtle stuff is more my thing, and they're good at that. Some quick little phrase, or a look into the camera makes me giggle every time. Seinfeld. I love them. I wish I could be as honest as that...and I wish I had close friends like that...someone who'd drop everything to go get soup with me, or to drop me off somewhere, or to just come over and hang out. I suppose my closest friend does that...we eat a lot of lunches together. I love her-she's the only one who MAKES time.

Ask me anything

Do you have any scars on your body? If so, how'd you get them?

I have lots of scars. Some of them for funny reasons, some for sad, some on purpose, some not, some from scary moments, some from clumsy ones.
Dog bites: hip and thigh. Falling from a swingset: lower lip. Scab-picking: all over. 2 surgeries: chest/stomache. Car accident in 1995: rolling my truck 5 1/2 times-created quite a few. Earring being yanked out of my ear: both ears-different times-both in high school.

Ask me anything

How would you describe your personality?

Depends on the day. Melancholy, bleh, dark, sarcastic, funny at times, paranoid about certain things...nothing a whole lot of therapy couldn't help... I can almost always turn on/off a smile. People always think I'm happy, but they aren't paying close attention. My family brings me joy.

Ask me anything

What one thing are you exceptionally good at?

There are plenty of things I'd like to be able to say...
I'd like to think I'm a good parent. I get a lot of compliments on my kids, and how polite/kind/helpful they are. My husband and I have tried so hard to give them a strong foundation. If that sticks, I will consider myself a success. Really, it just boils down to this: "Respect others and their things." and "You are known by the company you keep." If they go out into the world everyday with these two small nuggets, I think they'll do alright in the world. I wish every parent taught this.

Ask me anything

Pan Fried Cajun Chickpeas | Aggie's Kitchen

These sound SUPER YUMMY!!!

Pan Fried Cajun Chickpeas | Aggie's Kitchen: "Pan Fried Cajun Chickpeas
(printable recipe)

1 can chickpeas (aka garbanzo beans)
2-3 tsp flour
2-3 tsp Cajun seasoning
2-3 TB olive oil
sea salt, to taste
Rinse and dry chickpease on paper towel. Be sure to dry completely.
Heat oil in a non stick skillet over medium high heat. Combine flour and seasoning in a small bowl or plate. Roll chickpeas in seasoned flour until lightly dusted. Carefully add chickpeas to skillet, in batches, cooking for a few minutes before gently tossing them around in pan.
Cook chickpeas until they look crisp and lightly browned. Remove from pan and serve warm."

Stuff you don't need to know. I'm bored.

I am way too addicted to my laptop.
I am a KILLER at air hockey.
I am terribly competitive...sometimes to the point of anger when I don't win.
I love the rain.
I love thunderstorms.
I am crazy about Netflix! THE BEST IDEA EVER! : )
I dislike Canadians and all things Canadian. There's GOT TO BE some nice ones out there...but in the course of taking cust serv calls from them, I didn't speak to one of them.
I don't understand how a person can function without knowing their personal info-such as address. I don't send myself mail, but I know where I live!!!
I have a very good friend whom I have never met!
I spent two months in Germany and because of a combination of alcohol and a swiss cheese memory, I barely remember it.
I love knee socks! Target has cool ones-lots of different patterns and colors. They make me smile.
My favorite color is brown.
My favorite season is Fall. It only seems to last about three weeks here, but they are beautiful weeks.
I hate thin mints...YES the Girl Scout cookie.
I love being a brunette.
I am enjoying my 30's much more than I thought I would.
I don't like ice cream or cake, but I crave them sometimes. My favorite cake is chocolate with mint frosting; my favorite ice cream is Baskin & Robbins Quarterback Crunch.
I like the peanut butter M&M's but not the rest. I will eat peanut if that's all there is. I NEVER eat the red ones...no matter which kind.
I like vanilla frozen yogurt with carob chips- I'd choose that over ice cream any day.
I am a hard-core bleu cheese girl! I love everything bleu cheese! (I will say bleu cheese gum might not be good)
I still play Slug Bug...and I hit hard.
My favorite place I've ever lived was our apartment in CA. Lots of reasons...first place/lots of firsts for us and our son/best friends next door-too many good memories!
I love to sing. I sing or hum almost all the time. I will tell you I can't sing, when there's a possibility that I can...
I have never had a birthday party-like a surprise party-which works out because I don't like people making a fuss over me. But I love to go all out for hubs and the kids!!!
I dated my husband for only about five months, on the weekends (he was out on the ship during the weeks), and then we broke up. Two months later we eloped! It's been almost 15 years! He feels like home to me.
We raised chickens when I was a child. The incubator was in my room!
I went to school with a NASCAR driver-a very famous one! He was in my English class.
I was a certified scuba diver by the time I entered the eleventh grade. I never felt so free as I did when I was diving. Someday I'd love to go diving in the Great Barrier Reef...sharks or no sharks!
I make my kids read every day, but I hate to read. The last novel I read took me over six months. I get fidgety while I am reading and I can't concentrate. I will just stare into the page to make it look like I'm reading with them. I just have to remember to turn the page occasionally.
I would wear pajamas and slippers every day if it were socially acceptable.
I don't like to be touched...my daughter is insane about asking for back scratches. How's that for irony? It figures...
I am afraid of birds and butterflies. (but not sharks)
I pick at scabs-compulsively. It's bad; I have to scratch it off. I was once in line at the store and this guy had one on his shoulder. I scratched it off before I knew what I was doing. Random embarrassment!
I really really detest dogs. I know a lot of people love them, and that's fine, but I will never own one. Not only have I suffered through three seperate attacks, the last dog we had was a nightmare! I will pet other people's dogs, and even take care of one if asked, but I will not own one.
We have two cats-and I'm allergic to them.
I can grow my nails, but for some reason I chew or tear them off. The only way for me to grow them, is to paint them.
I am sarcastic.
I am not comfortable in my own skin.
I only have three or four items in my closet that I really feel comfortable in...other than hooded sweatshirts!
I don't think I have enough life insurance for myself or hubs; or the kids for that matter. If something were to happen to my hubs, I'd want to quit working and finish school. It would be crucial to me to stay home and be available to our kids. I'm not sure I could do that.
I would like to re-paint my kitchen floor, but I secretly worry that, even though I know better, I would paint myself into a corner and then have to stand by the microwave for three hours...while the food all resides just outside my reach. (The fridge is 3 feet away)
When I do something I shouldn't, I usually end up hating the consequences...and it's almost always not worth it.
I hate that my cat will hack something up and NOT come tell me so I can wipe it up before it stains the carpet.
I'd like to be one of the Oceanic 6.
I used to break thermometers just to play with the mercury inside. I may have single-handedly ruined it for every other child who did the same...or maybe they ruined it for me...either way, they only seem to make digital now.
I think it would be very handy (and less germy) to be able to stand and pee...however there is not enough money in all the world to make me want to be a guy-for more than about one day!
I almost never wear pink...but I own a pair of pink shoes-which I never wear! I bought them in San Diego the last time I was there. I saw a sweatshirt I loved in the airport, that only came in pink, so I bought the shoes went back to the shop on my way home, saw the same shirt in yellow, bought that one and then came home and bought yellow shoes to match the sweatshirt. Now I'm stuck with new pink shoes I never wear.
I can't ever seem to go to bed when I want to, or hope to.
I yell at the 10 O'clock news... A lot!
I hate double standards-what's fair for one, should be fair for all-without one of them being the devil, and the other the victim.
I am very opinionated...apparently.
I always have to go to the bathroom right before bed and as soon as I get up in the morning. Usually that's what gets me up-just so I don't wet the bed.
I grew up in a house with bugs and I still (after 20 years) shake out my towel every day...just in case.
I cannot sleep without my husband snoring. When it's quiet, I toss and turn all night. Not even the radio helps anymore.
I hate to share toothpaste, but don't mind sharing gum...I know, gross.
I hate having to use public restrooms...having my gall bladder removed when I was 23 seems to have 'cured' me of that. When I have to go...I HAVE TO GO!!!
I am totally hooked on Twitter, and I tweet like you wouldn't believe! I've even been Re-tweeted...which was a rush you cannot imagine. :)
I'm going to tweet that I'm making this list.
When I was a kid I was super tan! Now all I can do is burn. Is this a climate thing?
I wish I could blog...and secretly that I'd become famous for my blog. It'd be anonymous and I'd be rich!
I would love to be a professional student.
I'm addicted to purses and bags. If I could, I'd buy one everytime I went to a store that sold them. I saw one today, and can't stop thinking about it.
I haven't blogged in ages. This one is too long. Sorry on both counts.